p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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