porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I need moral support for this bender
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
