just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Success! We fucked roommates!
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