I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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