I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I would ride that face into the sunset
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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