Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
