Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
how do flat chested girls get laid?
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
But theres a keg here and me gusta
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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