I am puke
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
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