If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
