It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
