Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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