god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Randomize
