And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Randomize
