Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
