I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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