I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
