You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Randomize
