nut hugger
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Don't tell me you're on acid again
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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