I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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