i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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