Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
