My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
