we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize
