why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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