i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
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