Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Panties = found
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
