i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize