hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i would punch a child for taco bell
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
