the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Randomize
