I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
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