Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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