I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
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