My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
