Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
