super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
