Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
