White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Randomize
