Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
