This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
