somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
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