how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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