It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Randomize
