Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
