the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
