It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize