farters have to be the big spoon...
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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