so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
