Grow some girl-balls and come out already
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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