hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
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