There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
