Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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